Payment Plan Aficionado Gifts

'You give me one third, another third to the cashier near the escalator, and the balance before leaving the store.'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

The Pill-of-the-Month Club!

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

'Regarding where you stand for a payrise - you don't.'

"Well, we can try. But to be honest, I doubt that you'll get custody of your husband's credit cards."

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

'Dear sir, every month we place all bills in a big pile on the table, and select six at random for payment...'

'We will conduct the background check. Our fortune, Madame Zula, will conduct a complimentary future check.'

"It may well be the root of all evil, but it's also the root of all this."

'Money isn't everything...but it should be.'

Abraham Lincoln sends his first bill - Three score dollars and ten.

"I see it's payday again Perkins!"

'She's just like her mother. Her first word was the name of our credit card.'

'We offer a comprehensive healthcare plan, paid vacation, and a generous pension. Unfortunately, we can no longer afford to pay you a salary.'

'Okay, Simms, we have a verbal agreement, but I'd like my lawyer to check it.'

Businessman has credit IV.

"Guess what, Mark - We all got raises."

"When did Charlie switch to a subscription model?" "Sniff my butt"

Gross Outrage.

'Let's face it, you'll just have to pay by instalments and that's just for the deposit...'

"Two years at home Son, and all you've earned is points on my credit card."

Shipping contract.

"Your credit score is lower than your golf score, even with your handicap."

'Sorry, Coach. My endorsement contract requires me to hold this can of soda at all times.'

"Will you accept my master's card?"

"Cards only Mister. In this inflated economy, cash kills my investment portfolio."

'When did they start printing money of RICE PAPER?'

National Bank and Loan - We'd like more of the same.

"My dream job? That would be a 'money tester!'"

'I prefer to be paid six monthly, my wife only kisses me on pay day.'

'Indian art. It reminds me of coming home on pay day.'

"Oops...nothing but IOUs I never paid back!"

'Yeah, I use ATMs all the time, but I refer to them as 'Mom' and 'Dad'.'