Patient Person Pillows

Long queue.

'Bored?'

'You'll get wet. Why don't you use your new umbrella?'

"You might as well wait inside. She's still grooming."

"Thank you for remaining on the line so long. All our agents are apparently a lot busier than you are."

Bob had to confront his fear of butterflies.

'No, Mr. Simmons, your MR images aren't in yet. We have older equipment, which takes a little longer to process.'

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."

Invoice: 'That's good laughter is the best medicine.'

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

'Sorry I am late - have you been waiting long?'

"Ah, the waiter ... And I was beginning to wonder if we really existed!"

"I made a list of all my symptoms. Lost the list. Can't remember any of my symptoms now."

'Your test results are in - and here's a first, the Lab Techs have asked to meet you.'

Please Wait and wait and wait.

'I'm going to be a little late.'

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

"The Doctor is just wonderful!! He listens to all my irrelevant, boring stories!"

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

"Dehumanization, maybe, but not depersonalization."

"Are you going to move?"

'Of course, they're healthy - they listen to me far better than my patients do.'

"The doctor will see you in a week - if you could still be ill a week on Wednesday."

"Repetitive strain injury?...theres a lot of it about."

A feast in a hospital bed.

Bureaucracy (Murphy's law)

'There's only one side effect from this medication. It starts when you don't pay my bill!'

"Back here in 30 minutes?"

"Trust me, this place is worth the wait."

'I can give up drinking and lead a normal life?- Make up your mind, will you?'

"Take me! After 15 minutes of cell phone chatter and day-time TV, a colonoscopy will be a relief!"

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

Burt's love of garlic was making him most unpopular with the other patients.

'Fashion Victim.'