Passive-aggressive Humorist Pillows

Introducing...Superegoman!

"I need a gift for my new daughter-in-law... ou know, the one who stone my son from me!"

"Attention seeker"

"Passive-aggressive musical chairs." "You sit. I don’t deserve to" "I couldn’t possibly." "Maybe two of us could share." "Someone else go first." "I actually prefer standing."

"This is your great aunt Adriana. She sent 'thank you' notes to people for no reason."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

'I think the new V. P. of Global Development is here.'

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

Dog fetching clown shoes.

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

'It's okay if don't want to give us control of your company. We're perfectly capable of living with incredible disappointment.'

Bob liked getting involved - but not actively involved.

"I'm glad you like this new brand of coffee, Joni. The label said "fast-acting," but who knows what that means!"

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

'I can dish it out, but I can't take it.'

"Could you put me 'on hold' Mom? I could use a hug."

"Honey, you awake? Are you sleeping? Well, I hated your lasagna tonight."

'I'm screwed...'

My Gay Son Never Calls

Mothers Without Borders

"Well, you've fianlly done it! No more rainforest left!"

"Guess how long it's been since I've had a salary increase."

"You just had to develop passive-aggressive expressionism, didn't you?"

"When do your in-laws leave?"

'Don't make me use my chemical weapons...'

Santa's chimney climbing is a fixation with mothers womb

A Pat on the Back: $1.00

Have you tried drinking ?

"Can I bring you something else to complain about?"

Eve's Mom

"Sorry, but, as you can see, I finally found the answer to the true meaning of life."

'He was a very claustrophobic person.'

Break-ins by the Masochist Society

Snails of the old west.

"Lastly, we have Mr. Asher. He fancies long pulls on the rack, impromptu floggings and water boarding at nightfall."