Party Crasher Pillows

Thanks to new security precautions, Bob's surprise party held no surprises.

"The minute you walked into the room, I said to myself, 'Now, HE looks interesting."

"Awkward..."

Show house. 'I don't like the house. but your champagne's great.'

'Ah, it seems that I've completely misjudged the mood of the evening.'

'They do that every time. I think it's something in the meatballs.'

"He hasn't got much chance with her. She just told me to get lost, and I'm her husband!"

"Well, that's the only song we know, so we can play it another two or three times, or we can cut our losses. Waddya say, Cleveland?"

Mouse living in a wedding cake.

Space hopper as a bouncer of a nightclub

"Wow! This was sure one heck of a blind date!"

'I love rock festivals!'

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

"Jack'z the bestess friend. My wife still doesn't know where we'were that night..." Why we toast before we start drinking.

Second Thoughts Wedding

'Always the usher, never the bride.'

"Hello dear- couldn't you sleep either?"

"They stay together for the money."

"Agreed then-I won't network you if you don't network me."

"Next week si my parent & teacher, principal, guidance counselor, crossing guard, bus driver and lunch lady conference. Is that bad?"

All my friends are getting married. I'm just getting drunk.

'Will you get me those healthy eating booklets form the hospital? . . . I need something to start the fire to grill these bratwursts.'

"Just because I switched political parties at an appropriate time?"

"I brought a six pack. Is that enough?"

Floating Voters

'You haven't touched the cheese yet.'

'Sorry, sarge! I was trying to get an invite to the wedding!'

"And what gives you the uneasy feeling that my workers comp claim is under investigation?"

Thank you, Thank you... One quick announcement - The owner of a large orange gourd - Please move your vehicle - You're parked on a loading zone.

'It's a party invitation, Phillip, not a hostile takeover.'

'Wait! The dating agency got it wrong! You should have dated me before her!'

'I've heard her dog has been against this from the start.'

There's no need to behave like a wild animal...but it's FUN!!!

'My best friend threw her bouquet to me at her wedding, and I ATE it!'

'You think he's good now...you should see him when he's sober!'