Particle Physics Gifts

'Quarks, neturinos, mesons. All those damn particles you can't see. That's what drove me to drink. But now i can see them!'

'Take a look at this everyone - it just could be the signature we've been looking for.'

"I hate being around electrons. They're so negative."

'You're awfully small for a proton - Are you sure you're not an ELECTRON?'

'Surrender God! We have your particle!'

"Once you have a collider, every problem starts to look like a particle."

Scientist feels down back of sofa, saying: 'I think I've found the Higgs boson!'

'Gentlemen, I propose we send the neutrinos on a speed awareness course.'

'Scientists claim they have found the 'God Particle'. In a related story, they are still looking for the 'Job Creator Particle'.'

'We must construct our own large hadron collider so that we can obtain results that are consistent with our cultural heritage.'

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"Are you certain that we have already detected all types of quarks?"

String Theory Lab

'I'm dubious. Neutrinos may be bigger than we thought, but they're not that big.'

"Just for fun today we could fire some eggs around."

Nigel finds the Higgs boson.

Spot the Higgs Boson competition

"Speed is its defining quality - hence the name 'Large' Hadron Collider."

"Have you tried turning it on and off again..?"

Rogue Traders from Parallel Universes.

After years of experimentation, scientists remain dubious about whether there really is such a thing as the Cute Particle.

"Ahem...any other reasons why you think you'd be suitable for working at the Large Hadron Collider?"

Atom Supply Co.

...Isolated clumps of strange matter pop briefly out of the quantum foam to debate the possible existence of particle physicists.

'What's the matter with your cyclotron?'

Two particles outside Hadron Collider; 'Fancy getting smashed this evening?'

'Oh yeah! Well I must've found a particle THIS small.'

Cosmic Ray's: Something belonging to Cosmic Ray

'Gentlemen, gentlemen, yes the neutrino beats the speed of light; but let's wait for the dope test.'

"We seem to be at that point where particle physics leaves of and theology begins."

"But if the particle is too small and too short-lived to detect, we can't just take it on faith that you've discovered it."

"I've done it – I've found the most basic particle!"

"You both have something in common. Dr. Davis has discovered a particle which nobody has seen, and Prof. Higbe has discovered a galaxy which nobody has seen."

large hadron collider