Parmesan Enthusiast Gifts

Trendy Drink

Cheese

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Party time.

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

"Bob takes everything with a grain of salt...and pepper...and garlic..."

Italia tours

Garlic Free Zone.

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"Pistachio almond—that's the buyout."

"Your meal sounded nice."

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

You're the sizzle in my roast!

"Your mother texted us that you're not getting enough to eat, so I brought you twice what you ordered."

Haute Chinese

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

Dad's old fashioned barbeque

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

Old Phones Lasagne

"The special is… pine nut encrusted… filet of salmon… in a balsamic wine reduction."