Parking Lot Philosophers Gifts

A man trapped on a traffic island

Disabled parking only sir.

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

'Sorry, pastor, your soul's grace period is eternity, your car's is six minutes.'

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

"To cross street, push button, wait for walk signal, wait, wait some more."

"Wanna swap?"

"The good news is, we've managed to secure you a ?7 per week pay increase. The bad news is, we're going to charge ?2 per day to park your cars."

A Not So Grand Slam.

'Andrews, a parking space will be assigned to you in a day or two.'

Mission Impossible

Parking Yesterday, Parking Tomorrow, But Never Parking Today.

"You can't compete with a retired pharmacist."

"Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia or traditional baguette?"

Spiritualist Society Parking

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

'Try not to smile, sir. Imagine you're looking for a parking space.'

'It's green, you color-blind, flea-bitten bonehead! Where'd you learn to drive?'

St. Lukes Church: Pray and Display

'Not that we don't appreciate the popcorn, but how about something low-carb next time?'

Man reading in a dark park using a streetlight as a book light

'Nice parking job, Rudy.'

"Venal, narcissistic, power hungry politicians. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em."

Private Parking Enforced by Drones.

"Not unless they're gluten-free bread crumbs."

"I gave at the office!"

"Great. He took two spaces. Now where do I park?"

"The 'sharing economy?' But I don't even know you!"