Parents With Young Children Pillows

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

Toddler Feeding Solutions

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

"And this is our son Danny's room. Danny is being raised by wolves."

"Me? I thought you were raising them."

Dad Planet: 'Hey you KIDS! I thought i said no ORBITING in the house!'

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

"The sellers had a lot of kids, so they got tired of running out of hot water. So they upgraded."

Early Night Club

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

Baby eating "Uploading", Baby on toilet "Downloading"

"We couldn't find a sitter."

"A five, six, seven, eight, Mooooom!"

"I'm going to need a pediatrician, two vets and an ornithologist."

Sweets

Childhood's End

'We lease the children, of course!'

'Watch out for my little brother -- he's clothing-optional.'

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

"Your turn to put them to bed."

'I told him that you said people should share things with the less fortunate!'

MEN, WOMEN, 'What are KIDS supposed to do?'

Dog with a dummy.

"No kidding? And it took me 20 minutes to climb up here!"

'I went to school with Mary today: Boy that was fun!!' (colour)

'I need a helping hand.'

Santa-Claus-Trophobia

Hug Robot going silent

"You wanted to sleep in bed with us- start proofing these briefs."

"Ooooh, Mommy...do these things come with instructions?"