Parents Of School-age Children Gifts

'He's doing so much better, lugging that backpack to school, since we started him on steroids.'

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

"Yes, Donald, I know you didn't expect a test today... that's why it's called a pop quiz!"

'Here's another email from a parent, written in lower case with no punctuation and seventeen spelling errors, demanding we do a better job of teaching social skills.'

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

Early Night Club

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

"I'm going to need a pediatrician, two vets and an ornithologist."

"What is the battle cry for homeschoolers?" Kids: "Go Home!"

Childhood's End

Sweets

"The bully at school keeps calling me a snowflake."

'I told him that you said people should share things with the less fortunate!'

Mom and child visit principal who has a sign on the door - Nap Time.

MEN, WOMEN, 'What are KIDS supposed to do?'

"No kidding? And it took me 20 minutes to climb up here!"

'I went to school with Mary today: Boy that was fun!!' (colour)

'I need a helping hand.'

'The dog kinda ate my homework. He deleted it off my hard drive.'

'There goes my part as a wise man in the Christmas pageant.'

'Look,Mum, that poor man's got toothache too!'

"Ooooh, Mommy...do these things come with instructions?"

'I ate some modeling clay in school today. It's okay, they're not going to make me pay for it...'

"Tell me truthfully, mummy, was I adopted?"

Hug Robot going silent

Santa-Claus-Trophobia

'I may lose the connection intermittently.'

'When the new employment laws come in parenting is going to be a whole lot easier...'

'Check out his litterbox. It must be the deluxe model.'

'Babies can't open these safety caps ... But then neither can I!'

'Don't patronize me. We both know I could do better. Why do you always have to be so hypocritical?'

"I'm bucking the trend. I'm moving into my parents' attic."

'Goodnight honey! Sleep tight!'

Fireman attempts to rescue trapped children from pub foot rail