Parenthood Preparationist Pillows

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

Baby pram as a tank

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

Toys in the DVD Player.

"Which one's yours?"

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

"Bless, Poppy's first tweet!"

'This is not fair, mom. . . none of my friends is forced to hibernate before December.'

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

"I didn't realise it could be so complicated!"

"Yes, "breeding like rabbits" is often used in a pejorative sense. The truth is, we don't care as we love having kids..."

'You can have a cute little boy like me. All you have to do is get pregnant.'

'I'm afraid we don't deliver on Sundays.'

'This is boring. This uterus could sure do with a fast forward button.'

"Why are you special? Because I'm your mommy, and I'm special."

"We've completely child-proofed our home."

Maternity Arrivals

"I know he's little, but he uses it."

'Slap me and I'll see you in court.'

'Good news dear, the doctor says we're going to have twins.'

"Congratulations, you're expecting triplets."

"He seems to be a bit of a crybaby."

"Are we there yet?"

'Evan, I think your little sister may be trapped in there with you!. . . Jennifer! Are you in there, honey?'

"We discussed a lot of options but decided on a water birth."

"Your baby is fine, but we're keeping her overnight as a precaution. Here's a loaner."

"I hate to be a dream snatcher but your baby is going to be just average."

'They can be so modest at this age.'

My changing Body: A Guide For New Fathers

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Winter Clothing'

Baby Shower

"Have you ever heard the saying, 'Two heads are better than one'?"