Parenthood Prepper Pillows

"Which one's yours?"

101 Placenta Recipes

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

Baby pram as a tank

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

A sun opens its mouth to eat a burning Earth

Toys in the DVD Player.

Zombie Problems

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

The End is Nigh

S.O.S. vaccine

'You can have a cute little boy like me. All you have to do is get pregnant.'

'We've never had an accident - aside from three of our five kids.'

Holiday Gifts 2020

'This is boring. This uterus could sure do with a fast forward button.'

'I'm afraid we don't deliver on Sundays.'

Maternity Arrivals

"We've completely child-proofed our home."

"My next book? It will probably be about rising up and crushing humanity."

'Good news dear, the doctor says we're going to have twins.'

'Slap me and I'll see you in court.'

"He seems to be a bit of a crybaby."

"Are we there yet?"

Trick or Treatment.

'It's the worst I've seen in this area. Lots of chicken pox going around.'

'They can be so modest at this age.'

"I hate to be a dream snatcher but your baby is going to be just average."

"We discussed a lot of options but decided on a water birth."