Parental Gladiators Gifts

'Let's get ready for daycare!!'

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

'Here comes your Daddy - Do you want me to do the talking?'

I'm Spartacus.

The locker room door suddenly swings open, and Randy is busted by a steroid-sniffing dog.

'Do you think Mum and Dad are trying to keep an eye on us, by enroling on the same university course as us, Colin?'

Baby Footballer

"When the new employment laws come in parenting is going to be a whole lot easier...."

Kids go to school and mom goes to the psychiatric clinic.

"Calm down, I'm just using the rules of modern competition."

An older white male executive is barely hanging onto his career

'Miss Harrison said it's a better report than the ones you used to get when you were in her class.'

'Only two cookies? What is this -- a quota system?'

"Do I read better than Mommy?"

'Wow! Feel that kick! I'm buying him a football for his first birthday!'

"He's two onths old and already drooling at a four-month-old level."

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

It's payback time at the sadistic dentist's office.

'My kid is going to Harvard, and Jim's son to Stanford- which college accepted yoyr kid, Fred? ( pix of clown on desk)

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

'Better put this on. . . health and safety.'

I got a hundred in school today... 50 in history, and 50 in maths!

Kitchen Appliances Fed Up With The Baby.

"And these are the twins, Buzz and Buzz-off."

Still working from Hell

"Congratulations! It's a doctor!"

"Accepting the applause for Mr. Fontana—Mr. Fontana's mother."

Going Shopping Together.

'After the day I've had at the office, I'm expected to stir my own tea!'

'It's all over! Warm up the bus!'

'Can I have my quarterback now?'

The Baby in the Theatre