Parental Expectation Challenger Pillows

"But, sweetheart, why do you have to marry a doctor? Why can't you marry a fireman?"

Yummy Mummies

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

New dunce caps

Apprehensive about leaving the baby with a sitter for the first time, Michelle scales back her romantic dinner with Al.

'I have her registered in a pre-med nursery program.'

"When the new employment laws come in parenting is going to be a whole lot easier...."

"I just called to say I love you, but come to think of it - can I borrow some money?"

'From what you describe, it looks like it's my dad who has the Maternal Instinct...'

Be A Doctor

Kids go to school and mom goes to the psychiatric clinic.

"My dad doesn't nag me enough about going to college."

"I can't wait to get home and insult my parents from a position of authority."

'My kid is going to Harvard, and Jim's son to Stanford- which college accepted yoyr kid, Fred? ( pix of clown on desk)

"Do I read better than Mommy?"

"Looks like Dad has finally given up on trying to beat us at chess."

'Don't take it too hard, Dad, Mr. Hodes down the street is just having a great year.'

Money And Prestige

'You could give it to your mom with a huge Valentine card.'

Mother Love is Without Logic

"We need to hurry to your next extracurricular activity before the void of my unfulfilled ambitions catches up."

Smacking Machine.

'After the day I've had at the office, I'm expected to stir my own tea!'

"Do you have any other snack concepts?"

The Baby in the Theatre

"Little Jimmy's at the difficult age where he's grown up."

'It's all over! Warm up the bus!'

"Zach is in the gifted-and-talented-and-you're-not class."

"Hi, Honey—what achievements today?"

"I'm afraid you could do better work in order to get your daughter into this school."

"Two months with this and they blow their preschool entrance exams right out of the water."

"If I had to guess I'd say your son's acne is the result of a sudden surge of hormones."

"Oh, my! Is that really me?"

'Sixty eight seconds. Pretty weak, Dad.'

"Boy or a girl, it doesn't matter. As long as it's a whiz kid."