Parental Appreciation Pillows

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

"Could I ask just one question?"

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

'Maths is fun!'

Higher wisdom...

'A dog ate my homework.'

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

In an unprecedented occurrence, Noah Webster fails his vocabulary test.

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

Presentation: Any questions?

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"I adore kids, but I also adore Netflix."

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

'Eleven?.. you mean there's more numbers beyond the number of fingers we have?'

Child: 'If I've got five oranges, and you take away two, wouldn't that be stealing Miss?'

"You're fatigued, run down, anxious, with high blood pressure, back ache, and a general malaise. You've got kids."

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

'The first person to learn anything leaves immediately!'

'My teacher said my penmanship has really improved since I started doing my homework on an inkjet printer.'

The F.B.I.'s Least Wanted.

"So you can tweet. That's why you have to learn the alphabet."

"OK...for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

"Can you recommend something for the attorney who got me everything?"

'By the second week of instruction all first-graders should be able to count to one.'

"Ok clss pls trn ur pprs ovr n strt :)"