Parent Who Enjoys Dogs Gifts

Autumn Dog

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

"Satisfaction, stat!"

'It says here: while most dogs are family dogs, some dogs like one family member more. Do you think Fritzi is like that?'

I can't afford to pay for Fluffy's spay...

'...Basset Hound! Anal sacs!'

'Come to think of it son, there's not a single spot in this backyard I've not dug out sometime...'

"This is Dakota, Bodie and Scout—And our dog, Richard."

"We keep revisiting this leash thing... Why is it so difficult for him?"

"Do you think those sounds they make are some primitive attempt to communicate with each other?"

"So far, I've taught him to fetch."

'It's a nine-to-five job, but most of it we spend napping.'

'We come in peace, I tell you!'

"Can you train him to bite my husband whenever the trash gets full?"

"I want everyone to leave the room, except for the cat."

"Did you or did you not perform the fake ball toss on my client, causing irreparable humiliation?"

"It just comes naturally. I have good people skills."

'I'll call you back, we just got in a load of furniture.'

Dog responding to his master doing a crossword.

No, I don't need a doggy bag, but how about a kitty bag?

'No doubt about it - he'd make a lovely Home Guard dog!'

"I understand everything he says, but I've found that maintaining a blank expression results in less work."

Every Dog Has His Day

"It's the Facebook of scentual media."

"We were at the park and he kept on pretending to throw the ball then hiding it behind his back: After a while, I lost it!"

'He keeps us young!'

The Man Who Could Talk To Dogs

"I like to think he looks like me, not vice versa."

This is your park - get busy and clean up the doggie-doo!

"He's part bok choy."

He takes being a guard dog very seriously.

Proud Parents of 'Best in Breed' City Kennel Club.

'I thought you OPERATE to remove the fish-hook, Doctor!'