Parent Of Students Gifts

'There goes my part as a wise man in the Christmas pageant.'

Likes: $2.

'I really wanted to only take accounting courses, but my parents made me take this cartooning class so I would have something to fall back on.'

"What can I say? Second grade just hasn't lived up to the hype."

'Your thesis on 'how to keep warm in winter'? Interesting.'

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

"Yes, Donald, I know you didn't expect a test today... that's why it's called a pop quiz!"

'Spelling, math, history, geography --now the stupid school wants me to take a polygraph test!'

"What did you study in school today, Gracie?"

'Here's another email from a parent, written in lower case with no punctuation and seventeen spelling errors, demanding we do a better job of teaching social skills.'

"Do you really use all of the stuff on this school supply list?"

'I'm sorry, but I haven't understood a word you've babbled since I turned left on red.'

"I'm enjoying kindergarten except for all the politics!"

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

'It wasn't my fault. They asked me about things that happened before I was born.'

'He's really putting that media studies degree to good use.'

"What is the battle cry for homeschoolers?" Kids: "Go Home!"

"Higher learning gets higher each year."

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

The surrendered mom

"The bully at school keeps calling me a snowflake."

Mom and child visit principal who has a sign on the door - Nap Time.

'I need a helping hand.'

Why should we keep going to school?

'The dog kinda ate my homework. He deleted it off my hard drive.'

"My fellow graduates, today we leave behind the trappings of youth, step boldly onto the road of life, and move back in with our parents."

Parents of student:'Shh George is revising!'

'After the revolution' (small people get small schoolbags).

'He's doing so much better, lugging that backpack to school, since we started him on steroids.'

"I got 75 percent right on my math test!"

"Yeah, I now how it is. . . I'm sending a boy through college too!"

'Right that covers nutritional theory in the socio-economic context of class structure in a eurocentric and essentially homophobic culture, now if one of you could take a tit out we'll do a practical.'

'Don't patronize me. We both know I could do better. Why do you always have to be so hypocritical?'