Parent Of A Kindergartner Pillows

'I ate some modeling clay in school today. It's okay, they're not going to make me pay for it...'

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of CSI: Miami to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45 p.m.? The Youtube Generation grows up fast.

Baby vandalizes an art gallery.

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"Yes, Donald, I know you didn't expect a test today... that's why it's called a pop quiz!"

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

"I'm OK. But I think the dog wants to go out."

'Three little kids and their first words. Can you find out which one is the British kid?'

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

Early Night Club

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

'Today, in kindergarten, we learned how to count to one.'

"I had it all figured out. Sleep late, watch TV, play all day...then kindergarten happened."

"I'm going to need a pediatrician, two vets and an ornithologist."

'We're letting you board first so the rest of the passengers will know where not ... uh, to sit.'

Childhood's End

MEN, WOMEN, 'What are KIDS supposed to do?'

"The bully at school keeps calling me a snowflake."

Mom and child visit principal who has a sign on the door - Nap Time.

"Mum...I have to do number five million, seven hundred and twenty seven thousand, six hundred and twenty ones!"

American Toddlers vs British Toddlers

Bad news - The children would like the inflatable moat blown up

"Charles — we missed you at playgroup."

'I went to school with Mary today: Boy that was fun!!' (colour)

"No kidding? And it took me 20 minutes to climb up here!"

'I need a helping hand.'

'The dog kinda ate my homework. He deleted it off my hard drive.'

Hug Robot going silent

"Ta-da!"

'I may lose the connection intermittently.'

"Ooooh, Mommy...do these things come with instructions?"

Santa-Claus-Trophobia

'Look,Mum, that poor man's got toothache too!'