Parent Groupies Gifts

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"Don't tell me... you hired a professional decorator!"

'You'll never be the next Micheal Phelps if you don't start working on your breaststroke.'

"Sorry I'm late with my grades. I was busy removing the 'Honor Roll' bumper sticker from the car."

'You can't start them exercising too early.'

'We've had an application from No.10 Downing Street. . . they need to extend their cabinet room.'

"If they shorten political campaigns, what will we do for entertainment?"

Australian baby with toys hanging from his hat rather than corks

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"If you're going to drink, we'd rather you do it in the house where we can party with you."

'Congratulations. It's a latch key kid.'

"Look what I found in the garage! My old music speakers!"

"Attention, please. At 8:45 A.M. on Tuesday, July 29, 2008, you are all scheduled to take the New York State Bar Exam."

Dad’s Homework Assignment

The cost of bringing up children soars to more than £140,000.

"Childbirth just isn't keeping pace with modern marketing. We still don't come with a manufacturing warranty.

"Give my kid a passing grade and you could be looking at many more nice apples."

"You think you've been kicked-around a lot? Try being me for a day..."

"I have two children by a previous tour."

"I still think we should go higher than Factor 0.5."

'It doesn't mention the things I'm a prodigy in.'

My child was student of the month...But that was a long time ago.

Mob Misfortune Cookies 'There's a gun pointed at your right now' 'You will take one for the team soon.' 'Leave the gun, take the eggroll.'

"I sometimes think my mom hovers too much."

"We had our baby through the NHS. It took nine months so maybe we should have gone private."

Keep away from our Doreen.

"Sweet? I thought you wanted someone with edge."

'Look on the bright side. It adds a cool echo effect to your bark.'

"I learned a lot from Trump. The secret is believing your own lies."