Paraphernalia Collector Gifts

"We collect cowboy-and-Indian paraphernalia. How much would you take for your pickup?"

'C'mon get it straight.'

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

'I love it when you spoon me.' 'I love it when you fork me.'

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

The Tectonics and Their Plates.

The Pencil and Sharpener

"You're fired, Withron. I got a terrific deal on a handful of ballpoints."

Jack in the box on strike.

"Just what is a runcible spoon?"

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

Posh Easter Egg

Biro Diversity

Fridge Magnets/Military Medals

"I don't think my parents have a lot of confidence in me."

"It's PENCILvania!!!"

"One fine day my son, all this will be yours."

"So unfortunately, I have to make some more cuts."

'It's a spork!'

A Fork-lift.

'I don't know what happened. One minute she's spooning me. The next minute I'm knifing her.'

Jar Wars: 'Use the forks Luke... Use the forks!'

'Ignore him, he's just angry because you're eating out of his bowl.'

'No fair, man. How come you get a dessert fork?'

People, we need to push the envelope, and the paper, pens and all the other stationery.

"Are we interested in a meticulously detailed, genuine silver coin, issued and authenticated by the Franklin Mint, honoring whichever schmuck wins?"

Paper Work

"It belonged to my great... great creepy Uncle Edgar."

Replica Football Merchandise

"Timmy discovers the Island of Lost Logos."

"The table of stationers would like to send you their compliment slips."

I love Fountain Pens