Paranormal Pottery Fan Pillows

"I must warn you that the house is haunted but the ghost are mostly interested in doing sexy ceramics."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

Broomstick crash.

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

'Trickle or Spray!?'

New Road Signs to Watch For:

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

"I'm actually pretty ready for bed."

"Had more ghost-hunters 'round my place last night....scared the daylights outta me!"

"It's not the paranormal activity that bothers me so much as the passive aggression."

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

"Get a tomb!"

"Devi's brew?"

"We should start wearing masks."

Telekinetics on strike...

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

Monster Self-Help

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's undead."

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

'Relax, we're letting you go. Your insurance didn't go through.'

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"Which one is yours?"

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

Death Beggar