Paradise Perpetual Gifts

'It's okay. I can telecommute.'

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

Golfing Bishop.

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."

"Is there an option to make my out-of-office message permanent?"

"Let's face it, this meeting isn't about tightening our work schedule. It's about stretching our deadline."

'The water hazard holds little fear for Jesus.'

'Can't you be happy without forever whistling?'

"Oh goody! It's just like the Columbian Exposition of 1893."

"As we're here for eternity, I expected at least a television."

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

'Eve ate the apple, and she's asking if you want to make it two out of three with oranges and bananas?'

'We're cutting you some slack because you just died but normally we frown on devil's food.'

"Horace, what are we doing on the same cloud? Our vows said 'till death do us part.'"

Give Way To Cyclists

Self Service Island

'I've been to seventh heaven many times, but this is my first experience with the real thing.'

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

'Hi, my name is Eve. Where is the mall?'

Clouds getting into angel's shoes.

"The only problem with Heaven is there's nowhere to hang stuff."

Not so heavenly

'I'm new up here...where are the men?'

'Missin' rib, snake, guilt, eviction. . . and not a Stress Counsellor in sight!'

'I didn't know I'd need a PIN number!'

'Life is becoming more and more expensive.'

"I've learned so much from my mistakes, I've decided to keep making them!"

"It's very nice. I just think they could add a spa."

"Wow! I guess you CAN 'take it with you', after all!"

'Ferguson always was an overachiever.'

"Your vacation is over, deal with it!"

'I thought everybody would be equal here'

Employees Only Door in Heaven.