Paperwork Ponderer Gifts

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Oh, but it's fine for you to grade papers?"

OWT - NOWT.

"With all the EU paperwork coming out I thought we'd locate here."

'It's an EIEIO!'

Bureaucrat Handling Your Application

Document Filing in the Post-Literate Era.

Intelligence: in...analyze...analyze...analyze...out...back in again'

'I wish I could help you, but there's too much paperwork involved.'

Fudge and defer trays in Immigration office.'

Desk bins: Pretend it's not here, Hope it goes away, Delegate it.

Border Bureaucracy

"You've got the research grant, but you have to turn over all your results to the energy department."

"Crap in" and "crap out"

"I like office work, it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours!"

politically correct czar: 'Popular...Elitist'

In again, out again.

InOut trays read 'pertinent' and 'impertinent'.

Office work stapling.

Eskimo office worker with in/uit workboxes.

Bureau of Government Pork: 'Good Lord! Who's going to pay for all this!'

Doo inc..can and no can.

'This search fee seems very high. Solicitor.'

The buck pauses here.

'Okay, let the minutes show we're not absconding with the money until the economy improves...'

'Does he mean before or after the needs survey?'

In, out, and back in again trays

Napoleon's Army of Men at Desks

Three work boxes: 'IN...LIMBO...OUT': 'I think I've found your bottleneck.'

'Here you go, just sign on the line, please.'

'Miss Fogarty, I'm not having any fun.'

'Well make up your mind, is it in or out?'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"