Paper Reader Gifts

"You taught him to bring the paper?" "Just the comics."

"He doesn't have a 'life coach' mother, he has a 'life couch'.

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

Punctuation Police

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

A Copy Editor and His Dog

Someone who knows apostrophes

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

Gen-Next Library

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

Asking out a palm reader.

'Bring out yer books!'

Personnel - "This letter of recommendation is full of misspellings!"

Desert $2.75. See? -- It wasn't a typo.

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'

"Baxter...about this report...your punctuation, spelling and grammar are perfect. No one can understand it!"

Contemporary English Lesson: The Cat was Sat on the Mat.

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

Reading the sports pages.

Quality Control

"Drop everything, Dominic. I need you to proof this for blasphemy."

'Don't laugh Ms. Newborn, but I want you to proof this for 'accuracy'.'

Rhinoceros Is Most Intelligent Ungulate

"Well, I think we come back as newspapers." "You're nuts."

'Don't worry. I'm not charging you for the extra lettering.'

"Confounded spell checker... never catches anything."

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

Ironing Punctuation

Madame ZuZu. Dream Interpretation. Tarot. Palms. She says the dream where I'm taking a test naked means I barely made it through school.

Large print e-book.