Paper Pyromaniac Gifts

"See, isn't this more fun than shredding?"

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

Here and There Trays

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

Shake it all about sign on desk

'The whole floor got together and came up with a few things you could work on.'

'Did you get the hard copy from Mr. Dawson?'

"Simplified application form? . . . This IS the simplified application form!"

In, out, shake it all about.

Desk trays - 'In', 'Out', and 'It depends'.

Trays on desk read: In/Out/Lose in the Shuffle.

"Well, if you hadn't misfiled it in the first place it wouldn't have been lost."

"Why, if it isn't Henshaw caught in the Overtime Warp again."

"I was just finishing up some spring cleaning."

'I can explain the Theory of Relativity, but I can't figure out which is the best Medicare Plan.'

In/Out Tray.

Basically, you should think outside the box, but don't color outside the lines!

Whack, Out of Whack.

"Actually, no, Bill, I can't move faster than this pace. Sorry."

'Somebody should tell our office manager that a motorized filing cabinet does not qualify as an electronic health record system.'

"Who ever said 'there's a time and a place for everything' never worked in this office!"

'Of course I'd never fire you, Nelson. You've been working here for such a long time, you've become part of the furmiture!'

"Which of you knows how to operate the paper shredder?"

"Mr. Stiltz asked Jean to ask Genie to ask Kelley to ask Dawn to ask Lisa to tell you he'd like to see you in his office."

NeighWoof.

'Sorry I'm not at the meeting, sir

'We are in a race against time and the auditors. Gentlemen...start your shredders!'

'Remember, Preston, all work and no play make you employed.'

"He's my hero. At 5 he just knocks everything off his desk and calls it a day."

'Dear, the good doctor appears to have misplaced my file. Can you fax over your copy?'

In-tray, Out-tray, While you were on holiday-tray

"These insurance papers you gave us are for an '86 Buick."

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'