Paper And Pen Lover Gifts

Squeezing the Free Press.

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

'It's a Joan Biro.'

Where Indian ink came from.

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

Hamlet in the craft shop.

"I need a special pencil for math...one with a lot less wood and a lot more eraser."

"Just as I thought! You used our competitor's paper for your resume!"

Biro Diversity

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

Penguins in the form of writing Pens

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

A man crosses a fountain pen bridge to reach books.

Je Suis Charlie

Weapens of Mass Instruction

Indian snake charmer charms a snake.

"This next song I just wrote, and it's called 'I Hate Fountain Pens.'"

"This X-Ray proves conclusively that you don't have a book in you."

"Oprah is definite, Barnes and Noble is giving you front windows, and Norman Mailer has agreed to a feud."

"It's ironic. It looks like you're here because you're such a bad cartoonist."

'I'm not cut out for this job' (Matisse sketch to cut out paper model)

'Man in suit wears tie in shape of a pencil.'

Steadman - The Early Years.

Man reading on top of giant pencil being carried by others.

"I'll pencil you in for recess."

Spilled Ink

'My advice; forget the elephant in the room - focus on the Quad Demy.'

"Getting a little thin on top and dull below, eh Pop?"

'It's Jopnes Sir! He's showing off his ballpoint pen again!'

How to write