Pantomime Appreciator T-Shirts

Never argue with the mime.

Madonna of the Pukes.

"Extreme miming"

Trump! The Musical

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Night of the Zombonies.

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

'Every new year Gym membership goes up - for the Panto season.'

'They're still following me?! Oh geez, what if they're in some sort of gang or something?'

Cinderella waits at bus stop.

"Darling, do you ever worry that we're becoming some sort of Merchant-Ivory production?"

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

Lot for people who don't know how to park.

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

"You can't beat the smell of the greasepaint..."

"I gotta cut you off, Pierre. That's your tenth 'pretend Manhattan' since you got here."

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

TV Interactive panto - Remote control buttons: Oh yes it is - Oh no it isn't.

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

"I think you might be overdoing the omega-3 oils George."

Plumbing Cartoon 7437: Invention of an Automatic Toilet Flusher A) A plumbing Engineer left a stall, toilet paper stuck to his shoe, B) turning the roll, C) releasing a catapult, D) shooting a ball to a loop-de-loop. E) When the ball hit the plumbing engi

Mime father in the delivery room.

Quiet Quitting

"Everyone loved working with Doctor Patel... Beer!"

If you give a mouse a French cookie: "And suddenly the memory returns. The taste was that of the little crumb of madeleine which on Sunday mornings at..."