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Ian Hislop

Alan Davies.

"Well done, you've beaten the panel....What really appalling disease do you have?"

Rob Brydon.

Books And Their Authors: "Hollywood's view of shoes..."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

Mighty Man Of Justice Is Born

"Good evening several times and welcome to QI. As usual I'll be asking a series of quite interesting questions and some comedians will be doing a lot of knob and fart gags. It's a winning formula!" "Don't knock it. No one likes knockers!" "Speak for yourself!" "Was that an entendre? I'll have a double." "Mine's a large one!"

"What would you like to watch again?"

"I'm so looking forward to the weekend, there's a show on: We're going to be pampered and they'll put lovely ribbons in our manes..."

Clive Anderson

"Afterward, there will be a short Q. and A. that will be just long enough for one person to take up too much of it."

Unable to get going each day without her dose of Katie Couric, Lois shifted her schedule to be in sync with the star's new evening news job.

Solar Cars

'Of course cutting back on this level of bureaucracy will require a lot of work...'

'Thanks for tuning in - we'll try to pander to you.'

"This is our format: Three minutes to present your case, two minutes each for rebuttal, one minute for summing up, and thirty seconds for claiming victory."

"The election is underway!"

And that's why I'm still single!

Walter The Sea Monster

'It's not a punchline to an office joke or TV commercial, Perkins. 'You're Fired' - for real!'

"His name is Tin Tin Rin."

'Hello, Mum!'

'I earned these from my alternative energy initiative...they're solar panels.'

"The subject of tonight's discussion is: why are there no women on this panel?"

Performer

Ian Hislop.

David Mitchell

"I'm willing to try you out. But you'll have to give up the whole cat thing."

We interrupt this breaking news to bring you breaking news! About half an hour ago, we interrupted "The Price Is Right" to bring you breaking news. An elderly "Price Is Right" fan emerged out of nowhere and began pummeling our news van with rotten eggs. Our newscopter is bringing us video of the lady chasing our van. What is that she's driving, Chuck? I believe that's a Rascal Scooter, Ted.

Name That Salary

"You'd better not be thinking about using that remote during my show!"

'Before I start, my lawyer advised me to have you all sign this non-disclosure agreement...'