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Henri Matisse

The Art Student.

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

"It's Chicken Mole!"

'I WANTED to paint the room a shade of green, but gave up somewhere between chartreuse and citrine.'

Vincent Van Goat.

"I like it, honey ... it speaks to what a waste of time your MFA was."

'I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

'I'm going through my 'blue period' - all my other crayons have broken.'

I'm color blind, please help.

"Stop staring"

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

Crayo-Blah

''Midnight in Paris' didn't work in the conference room. Let's try something more vibrant like 'Sunrise Over Wall Street.''

Artists supplies: Fire Sale - Oil paints, burnt umber, burnt orange, fire red, hot pink.

Divine Intervention

Negotiations over the new colour scheme had reached stalemate.

Artist painting a picture of a pavement, "Y'know, being a pavement artist isn't all it is made out to be."

'Face it, DuChamps -- you're in a rut.'

Artist paints UNDO icon onto canvas.

Shadow Artist

Brick Red Paint...

"Can we be seated under a vegan painting?"

'I didn't get a grant.'

'It's another canvasser dear'

'I love an empty canvas...especially yours...'

"Oh, I can paint alright, but only miniatures..."

Still life?

Paul Gaugin

'See you tomorrow!' says artist to the fruit that has been posing for him.

'Sorry, Steve, but we're trading you to France for two impressionists and a dadaist to be named later.'

"Do you want my opinion as an art critic or as your best friend?"