Paleontology Punster Gifts

"Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about that?"

'I know you're on a diet, but they didn't HAVE any small ones!'

When mammoths started losing their hair.

Dinosaur to dinosaur eating caveman: 'Don't be ridiculous, you're herbivorous.' ('Exactly. His name was Herb.')

'We didn't know what to call it, as it's neither fish nor fowl.'

Ideas Ahead of their Time

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

Water is discovered on the moon....

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

Dogs life

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

Mystery of the Poets

Veloci-Rapper

"Let's not try to make this symbolic. Of anything."

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

Standings: Milky Way Conference

How The Ice Age Began: 'OK, can we freeze it right there...'

'This is the age of specialisation - you can't be a hunter AND a gatherer.'

Pig philosophy class - 'I'm pink, therefore I'm ham'

Atlas working out with the earth as his exercise ball.

"Damn autocorrect!"

'Its a dogwood tree. I can tell by its bark.'

"Have you ever considered getting braces?"

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

'I'm calling my invention 'IPO'.'

'These continuous tax increases will be the death of us.'

'See? I've got a rock AND a stick! -- I've invented MULTITASKING!'

The Flirtateous Period