Paleontology Punster Gifts

"Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about that?"

'I know you're on a diet, but they didn't HAVE any small ones!'

When mammoths started losing their hair.

Dinosaur to dinosaur eating caveman: 'Don't be ridiculous, you're herbivorous.' ('Exactly. His name was Herb.')

'We didn't know what to call it, as it's neither fish nor fowl.'

Ideas Ahead of their Time

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

You too?! I go around feeling half asleep all the time also!

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

Dogs life

Water is discovered on the moon....

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

"Let's not try to make this symbolic. Of anything."

Mystery of the Poets

Veloci-Rapper

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

Standings: Milky Way Conference

How The Ice Age Began: 'OK, can we freeze it right there...'

'This is the age of specialisation - you can't be a hunter AND a gatherer.'

Pig philosophy class - 'I'm pink, therefore I'm ham'

Atlas working out with the earth as his exercise ball.

"Damn autocorrect!"

Uranus always gets a bad rap. Tap tap tap tap tap. What do you mean, dorkboy? I mean, no matter how mature people think they are, they always, always want to chuckle when they say "Uranus." Come on, Sadie. You know you want to smirk, even if it's in secret. What if I told you Uranus is slightly bigger than Neptune? Not chuckling! Uranus is always the butt of the joke.

"Have you ever considered getting braces?"

'Its a dogwood tree. I can tell by its bark.'

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

'I'm calling my invention 'IPO'.'

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."