Nature Punster Gifts

The birth of a zebra.

'Its a dogwood tree. I can tell by its bark.'

Leaflet

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

Intelligent people laugh too!

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

You too?! I go around feeling half asleep all the time also!

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Assault 'n' Vinegar

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

'Did you watch the horror movie?'

Ideas Ahead of their Time

Sweep the board.

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

Adam names the animals (He puts sticky notes on them saying Shaz, Dave, Trish etc).

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

"No chips, but I did snag the new Hiaasen."

"Where were you between 4 and 6?"

Dogs life

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

Water is discovered on the moon....

'It's worse than we thought: You've got termites.'

'He bought a donkey because he thought he might get a kick out of it.'

"You wanted the magic back in our relationship..."

"So is this war movie rated R, rated PG, or rated RPG?"

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."