Palace Photographer Gifts

"Not yet, wait until he faints."

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

"You're my Mona Lisa."

Framed Lady

"It makes me want to pee."

Diego Velasquez

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

"Stop complaining and smile! It's a job, isn't it? NO wonder they call you Mona!"

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

El Greco

'I'm a guard dog too.'

'I'd prefer it if the view was closer.'

"now let's try one without the tusks."

"Now this is how to enjoy the fall colours!"

Beefeater

Michelangelo Buonarroti.

Phoebe Mary Waller-Bridge caricature

"And that's me as a shepherdess!"

Welcome to celebrity hell.

AUGUSTUS JOHN

'Curses! My eyes were closed.'

'Well, you're not Michaelangelo!'

The caricature of Dorian Gray

Magestically Marble Hill

Bashful Royal Guard

Mitch McConnell

Duck painting picture of man painting picture of a duck.

'It's my latest invention. I call it 'Picture in a picture.'

'It's the least I can do. I don't have enough money to get cloned.'

Leonardo Da Vinci tries to make the Mona Lisa smile.

Stepped in Dog Poo.

"There! - It looks like you now!!"

"I've been posing for half an hour. Shouldn't you be painting by now?"