Paint Patron Gifts

"Yes, but is it art?"

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

Labor Day Flowers

A woman with a novel and poetry handbag.

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

Couple painting each other - one turns to the other and says, 'Hon, let's hire a model.'

"The audience is really classy tonight, they are throwing quail eggs."

Exhibition of Paint Colors.

"Miles... I'm going abstract!"

"This artist's very successful. And he's not even dead."

Tilted painting

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

'I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen, but in order for Act 3 to go on we'll need an additional $17,000!'

John Ruskin

Cezanne, after he had broken the laws of perspective.

'This one is from my pre-arts grant period'

Woman shops while man sets up noose. "Do I go with bright white, deep white...."

D.I.Y ladder

"It's just a lot yellower than we expected."

Duck painting picture of man painting picture of a duck.

Close... but no Degas.

'How did the 'creative way of thinking' course go?'

'I said I wanted a cake with a naked bird coming out of it.'

"Pfft. Derivative."

"Spanish ladies have nice eyes."

Homeless Man: 'So...your Park bench or mine?'

'Scottish Arts Council? I'm looking for sponsorship to help me sit through a performance of Gotterdammerung.'

"You have a nasty case of 'A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte' by Georges Seurat."

Lucia is further maddened by the early departure of a subscriber in a sports jacket.

"I painted still-lifes for a long time, but I'm slowly getting into figure drawing."

Picture Sale

Painting Camouflage jacket

Man and woman arm-in-arm, she says: 'Shall we paint the town Moroccan Velvet or Plum Blush?'