Package Delivery Gifts

'Relax, lady, I'm out of the baby business. Now I work for UPS.

"... and bless the UPS driver, who endures my instinctive barks, growls, yelps and yips."

LAY ZEE FUK

Food deliverer's baby.

"My owner is teaching me to think before barking, which gave Federal Express plenty of time to clobber me."

The Official Covid-19 Diet

We're willing to flee temptation, if we can leave a forwarding address.

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

'Wow, I sure got a lot of mail today!'

'Grrrr....'

North Pole twinned with Amazon

"I needed a gig to tide me over between baby booms."

Sisyphus Pizza

"Anything for me?"

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

'I didn't have time to hunt'

"There's the mailman!"

"Hold up ... where’s the ranch dressing?"

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

"I get a fresh food kit delivered for lunch. All I need to do is chop, cook, and enjoy!"

'Let's have some fun - Let's order from that place that guarantees pizza delivery in thirty minutes!'

"Careful it's hot." (Colour)

'Oh oh...this isn't my mace, it's whipped cream!'

"I just dialed 1-800-BAGUETTE."

Clerk: 'Boy that Delivery guy sure has a THICK accent!'

'I don't think I could have picked a tougher line of work.'

"Do you have experience delivering anything other than eggs?"

"Take off your mailman's uniform before you return home. We have a new dog."

"I would've gotten here earlier but I went on my lunch break during the drive."

"Somebody order a pizza?"

Do you realize the light from that star left over a hundred thousand years ago and it only just got here? That's nothing --- Have you ever phoned out for pizza?

Pizza delivery boy coming out of the television.

"My Doordash driver is at the front gate."

Beware of the dog.