Overeating Observer Pillows

'Your parents are so nice but why do they have a lock on the fridge door?'

Suicide by overeating.

Holiday Overkill.

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

Man opens refrigerator which promptly burps.

"Why does this curious plant of his always make me feel gigantic?"

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

Squirrel Tapping On Window Demanding Food.

'Hey, this guy's been operated on before!'

'Perhaps I was a bit too graphic in describing the surgical procedure.'

A football game appears on the operating theatres monitor instead of the patients heartbeat.

"And what would you like to regret later?"

"It's a turkey vulture, and it's got something big. Honey, where's Delia?"

"Look at that ant farm! I love the ants' little overalls!

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

"Whosoever pulleth this sword from this stone, and can eat just two or three of these double-chocolate Amaretto things without finishing the whole box, shall be king born of England!"

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

"I'm more of an 'I like to watch' dog."

Astronaut Selfie.

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'

No, I don't think they throw those up here for us.

'Help! -- I ate too much and I can't get up!'

Go Back to New York

Cat and Squirrel on Screen Door.

'I like it!'

"Oh, man. Ha ha! The look on your face when that squirrel turned around and started chasing you!"

Impractical Gardener.

Oculist.

'There you are - you know you're not supposed to be eating that!'