Outrage Enthusiast T-Shirts

"I'm busy! I'm searching the internet for something to be outraged about!"

"I'm just seeing if there's anything to be outraged at."

"I'm not going into college today, I don't feel enough sense of outrage."

Tourists and their Pets.

Glance Exchange

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"Bigfoot"

"Valet park only"

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

"I like fountains very much!"

'My dog is terrified of strangers. would you be a dear and wear this outfit while you're working here?'

"Find out who's got the licensing rights for this Armageddon thing and get them on the phone - quickly."

Man guarding a written border.

"Baldo, we need to talk."

"I dooon't know this sooonngg. I'm just heeeere with my daaaaaughter and her frieeeends."

"Well, by that logic no one would ever shave a clock onto a monkey."

'Oh Great. We just missed the once a millennia bus out.'

'Ah, it seems that I've completely misjudged the mood of the evening.'

'I know it doesn't look like much, but have you ever been shot in the face with a p****d off cat?'

'I just faxed my tie to our Des Moines office.'

"We're baitfish - we'll always be endangered."

Meter Maid

Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

"Hmm... I wonder what I can find to trigger my self-righteous indignation today..?"

"Riddle your salad with pepper, sir?"

'Your medical coverage does not consider that a medical necessity.'

'Bravo Professor, you stumbled upon the one fact that makes sense of it all. Unfortunately humanity is not permitted to know that the Universe was designed by a committee of ducks.'

'Please excuse my mother, this is my first interview.'

'If his chart dips down to 15 here, he'll start emitting a hellish, non-stop squeal.'

A shark swims into a desert island.

"This one to your liking, sir?"

Notice on desert island - sand for sale

'Serving pyranose from his buskin left some paly.'

Sugar Cube Machine

"That train is going to crash! Oh, well... it was meant to be."