Outdoor Project Pioneer Gifts

"Mrs. Dillof ... Mr. Dillof?"

'Almost anyone can learn to play golf, and you're the 'almost'.'

"Who can we call?"

'Don finally figured out a way to keep the squirrels from getting at the bird feeder.'

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

Bird Bath.

"....Reception on my tablet is so much better since I added wifi to my mule..."

'I need it for my electric blanket.'

Modern camping

'I thought a camping trip would keep your mind off work. What I'd like to know is how you got your desk out here without me knowing.'

'It would be just like my husband not to like the color.'

Castaway harnessing electricity.

"Central heat. Pretty posh."

Gardener digging and finding pipes.

Old man with zimmer frame waters tree being supported by a walking stick.

Wait! It might be cheaper to just knock it down and build from scratch.

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

'Doreen's been all over me to paint the house...'

Indoor Ice Fishing.

Rotisserie Chicken Rope Maker

"Ghah! I hung the new mirror upside down!"

Inflated Biography

Brookfield Historical Society LandmarkThe Captain Benjamin Ingham HouseBuilt in 1768 for $550 and 2 Tons of CodfishPresent Worth $3.5 Million, But Could Easily Bring $5 Million.

"He is very competitive. . . when he read about someone 'growing' a garden chair and he decided to grow a recliner and HDTV with surround sound system."

'Gerald loves an afternoon relaxing in the garden.'

Alien and Wind Farm

"It's nearly perfect, dear...you just have to plant the flowers the coloured side up..."

'We're a forward-thinking business, so I thought we'd go for this rather than a private jet. Want a lift?'

"Baldo, you spend too much time on that thing. Why don't you get yourself outside for some fresh air?"

'Dude, look. I took a snowboard and cut it in half... I think I just invented a new sport!'

Catching a Cloud

The March of Progress.

Scouting just hasn't been the same since Troop 90 found a long enough extension cord so they could sing around the microwave.

US Embracing Green Energy

"It's Mrs Jackson. Could you chuck a few more rubber bands in her border, she's run out."