Osteopathy Aficionado Gifts

"I'm fed up with Notre Dame - I've decided to go straight."

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

Egyptian chiropractor.

'Wendy! I'm glad you came over! I want you to see my baby's ultrasound hologram!'

'Another day. . . another half dozen medical breakthroughs for us to comprehend. . .'

"Sometimes it helps to turn a question around. Why not you?"

'I hope you don't mind me bringing a few medical students in to see you. '

"Hey, this anti-depressant you've come up with really works"

'You do Botox?'

'Hey, this guy's been operated on before!'

Man on left - 'What do you call a public servant who spends half their time doing private work?' Man on right - 'An MP?'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'Two Aspirins'...'Brain Tumor'

'You're going to have to give up painting ceilings, Michelangelo !'

"He's a whiz kid."

Air Dentistry

"Every time you lick your teeth, you taste your skeleton."

Orthopaedist

Meds Toast

"There are 206 bones in your body...How would you like one more?"

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

"You've got a bad case of Docwantsa Newkar."

"Relax, I'm only hear to see my osteopath."

Joint Replacement Specialist has 3 boxes on desk: "Hip", "Hip", "Hooray."

"There's everything you need to know about exercise in here." "Is there an osteopath's phone number in there?"

'I've got an appointment with Mr. Payne.' - 'He'll see you now.' - 'Okay, take a deep br-' - 'Gah!' - 'Great, now turn ov-' - 'Argh!' - 'And a final tw-' - 'Mummy!' - '*Sob*' - 'Okay, all done.' - 'Did you, by any chance...' - '...hear you crying...'

'Don't worry! If your self diagnosis turns out to be correct this time, this will take care of it.'

"You have what we are going to call Klitson's Disease, Mr. Klitson."

Good News, Bad News - Save the Leg.

'Try not to think about your car-parking charges.'

'Laser Surgery While You Wait.'

"I ran out of plastic skin, so I grafted on her credit cards!"