Osteopathy Aficionado Gifts

"I'm fed up with Notre Dame - I've decided to go straight."

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

Egyptian chiropractor.

'Wendy! I'm glad you came over! I want you to see my baby's ultrasound hologram!'

"Sometimes it helps to turn a question around. Why not you?"

'Another day. . . another half dozen medical breakthroughs for us to comprehend. . .'

'I hope you don't mind me bringing a few medical students in to see you. '

"Hey, this anti-depressant you've come up with really works"

'You do Botox?'

"We're going to run some tests: bloodwork, a cat-scan and the S.A.T.'s."

Man on left - 'What do you call a public servant who spends half their time doing private work?' Man on right - 'An MP?'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'Hey, this guy's been operated on before!'

'Two Aspirins'...'Brain Tumor'

'You're going to have to give up painting ceilings, Michelangelo !'

"Every time you lick your teeth, you taste your skeleton."

"He's a whiz kid."

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

"There are 206 bones in your body...How would you like one more?"

Air Dentistry

Orthopaedist

Meds Toast

"Relax, I'm only hear to see my osteopath."

"You've got a bad case of Docwantsa Newkar."

Joint Replacement Specialist has 3 boxes on desk: "Hip", "Hip", "Hooray."

"There's everything you need to know about exercise in here." "Is there an osteopath's phone number in there?"

'I've got an appointment with Mr. Payne.' - 'He'll see you now.' - 'Okay, take a deep br-' - 'Gah!' - 'Great, now turn ov-' - 'Argh!' - 'And a final tw-' - 'Mummy!' - '*Sob*' - 'Okay, all done.' - 'Did you, by any chance...' - '...hear you crying...'

'Don't worry! If your self diagnosis turns out to be correct this time, this will take care of it.'

"You have what we are going to call Klitson's Disease, Mr. Klitson."

M.D. Mrs. Hoskins is here to match wits with you regarding her symptoms.

Good News, Bad News - Save the Leg.

'Try not to think about your car-parking charges.'

'Uh-oh. This doesn't bode well.'

'Doctor, I asked for BOTOX injections, not BUTTOCKS injections.'