Organizational Ninja Gifts

"Please don't ask me to remind you to do anything else for awhile."

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

"Everyone seek higher ground! The paperwork is rising to a dangerous level."

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

I don't consider it "multitasking" when you have to do the same task over and over to get it right!

Accountancy

Desk trays: In House and Outsource.

"Please excuse the mess. We had a major paradigm shift."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

Go team!

'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

Trade Show Sherpas

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."

'Impressive resume, We'll verify it through Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr and get back to you,'

'Remember, Henson; we're not here to hobnob - we're here to schmooze.'

'I'm interested in your job opening, so I'll have my agent give you a ring!'

"New studies show that the so-called 'lucky man' made popular by the prog-rock band Emerson, Lake and Palmer was, in fact, just very well-connected."

There now, that wasn't too difficult was it!

The Card Flinger

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

'All right, I wanna know which one of you really like me and which ones are just networking...'

'An application won't be necessary, Sir. . . if you did it, we know about it.'

"Oh, go on Jeffrey. . . Give him an order!"

At the printers - "Business is booming I need 6 more business cards, ASAP."

Over enthusiastic headhunter

'We appreciate your back of the envelope calculation, Mike. Now put a stamp on the front and send it to somebody who cares.'

It's to stop you getting side-tracked.

Bob tried networking – and crashed it.

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

"Does 14 followers on Twitter count as 'leadership experience'?"