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"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

"I've reserved that seat".

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

Romance

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

A heart shaped cake

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

Frog flirting.

Klimt Kiss Phones

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

"I heard they mate for life."

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

'He may have an opposable thumb, but she has him wrapped around her little finger.'

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

Words of Love

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

Fully aware of the dangerous romance of Venice's canals and bridges, Gwendolyn approached this moment with a degree of caution.

Santa called but you were out!

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

Bigfoot and his wife...Bignose.

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."