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"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

"I've reserved that seat".

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

Romance

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

A heart shaped cake

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

Klimt Kiss Phones

"I heard they mate for life."

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

Frog flirting.

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

'He may have an opposable thumb, but she has him wrapped around her little finger.'

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

Santa called but you were out!

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

'Hey, that one looks just like a visible mass of condensed water vapour floating in the atmosphere.'

'You've got to help me, Doc! I've got a crush on St. Valentine all Year!!'

Words of Love

Fully aware of the dangerous romance of Venice's canals and bridges, Gwendolyn approached this moment with a degree of caution.

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."