Optimistic Commentator Gifts

Doom & Gloom

The Shrinking Dollar.

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

'Next on 'evening shouting match'...is it a bull or bear market?'

"Old economy, new economy - some things never change."

Cold drinks, candy and corporate buyouts.

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

"Since when did economists become sociologists?!"

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.

Bureau of Inflation.

Rebuilding the Economy.

'I like the jib of their cuts.'

"Brodkin, now that the economy is creating jobs at a faster than expected clip, why don't you go out and find yourself one?"

'Say, wasn't that the bluebird of happiness?'

'There is not a thing that medical science can do for you. Have you tried 'wishful thinking'?'

"The filthy rich"

'On the contrary-I quite enjoy that Monday morning feeling!'

'Crisis? Which crisis?'

'Today stocks dropped on news that the only thing to fear is everything.'

'I say this is the best we've been given for a long time!'

Vote GOP: 'Lowering taxes for the rich creates jobs, in the huge demand for security guards!'

Austerity Egg Hunt.

When Governments Bail Out the Sub-Prime Banks.

'I've put the business up for sale.'

'One might say the market's gone from the sub-prime to the iniquitous!'

'And in further economic news, the silver lining in the latest economic crisies has been downgraded to bronze.'

'At the Federal Reserve, Employees observed several minutes of silence in memory of 'Reaganomics'.'

Masochistic Soccer Fan

'How's business?'

'Going bald isn't all bad - just think, you'll never have dandruff again!'

"Recipes for disaster: Book 1, tariffs."

'Carrying that around will kill you in the end.'