Operation Enthusiast Gifts

'You have an 85% chance of surviving this and 20% chance of wishing you hadn't.'

'My turn! My turn!'

Patient Escaping from the Operating Theatre.

"Not responding to a knock-knock joke isn't proof he's unconscious."

'Our lawyers have declared the operation to be a complete success.'

'He's had so many operations, I'm putting in a zip!'

Surgery Instructions.

'A little more relaxant I think, nurse.'

Uh-oh!

"As a matter of fact, Caleb, it is brain surgery."

'...And don't get him started on his operation!'

'If it has the word 'ectomy' after it, I've already had it.'

"Knife...fork..."

"Uh-Oh..."

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

Maybe clean out your wallet

Experience-Productivity Ratio / Age-Salary Ratio.

New Memer/Incumbent

Proposal

Sir Edward Elgar

City Bar and Grill - "Stop worrying, youth and enthusiasm can't compete with experience and treachery."

"Hired! You're just what we need in our budget office!"

Woman puts a targeting sight on her vacuum cleaner.

Commando crashes into wall, instead of through window.

Business 101

R. Gelfin - The buck stops here, then gets buried in his pile.

'Note to self: Buy little recorder.'

"And if you look to the right you'll see what happens if you disrupt my class."

"I'm really impressed with your work ethic."

File room: A subsidiary of the black hole of the universe

Sir Joseph Porter, KCB, First Lord of the Admiralty HMS Pinafore

Richard Wagner

Johann Strauss

"Thanks, I'll write that down."

"I know the baby is in here somewhere."