Operation Aficionados Gifts

"We lose a little dexterity, but we gain a lot of confidence."

'The anesthesiologist called sick. It is my duty to inform you that you will feel a little bit of pain during the appendectomy.'

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Meet the author"

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

'If only every year was an election year.'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"Call me?"

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

Driverless cars rage.

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

Sitting in a tree

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

"What did you download at school today?"

'Yes, it computed the answer in a bilionth of a second and printed it instantly, but until I find my glasses...'

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

"Simplified application form? . . . This IS the simplified application form!"

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

Valentine Day

Bot Art: After da Vinci

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."