Online Security Gifts

'To improve security I used a two-factor authentication on my account: my social security number and my credit card number.'

Angel and devil advising on whether a man should open an email attachment.

'I can remember my PIN, password and post code, bit I've forgotten my name.'

'Hey, I clicked the 'Remember Me' box...and you don't?'

Identity Theft.

"User name and password?"

"Didn't anyone ever warn you about opening an e-mail from someone you don't know?"

"Don't worry, daddy already knows and likes you. He's hacked all your social media accounts."

"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."

"Don't believe everything you see online."

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

"Our privacy policy has changed. Press 'I Agree,' because what are you really going to do about it?"

Internet supervision.

"Password-sharing?! I only agreed to exchange vows...No one said anything about exchanging passwords!"

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

"You don't need to come in for any more check-ups . . . we can get most of your personal information off Facebook."

"Passwords? I use the different names I'm called at Starbucks."

'Phil thought up the middle name 'QX12PGY100' so he'd always have a secure password he'd remember.'

"I'm sorry your password needs to include upper & lower case letters & at least one number."

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

Phil thought up the middle name 'QX12PGY100' so he'd always have a secure password he'd remember.

"You realize that if you're reincarnated, you'll need to learn all new passwords?"

Man's only book is his list of passwords.

'Your session has timed out.'

'The best way to protect your privacy is through a flood of misinformation obscuring the truth.'

"I'm afraid some nude photos of myself might have been hacked. What should I do?"

"The government's health care site has been hacked."

"It's the only way that I can remember all my passwords..."

Terrorism Recruitment

This is not a scam. Send money and receive authentic 'This is Not A Scam' certificate."

"Oh, no. Somebody's hacked our computer!"

"My owners named me Kvduer92hybH20UDF8fhsj becuase they wanted to remember a strong password for their online banking."

Username/Password

"Would you like some usernames with your passwords, or do you prefer them plain?"

Security Question-Who was your favorite obedience school teacher?