Online Music Gifts

You know that symphony I wrote in GarageBand? It drops next week. You're invited. Symphonies don't "drop," little buddy. Rock albums "drop." R&B "drops." Symphonies "debut." And they usually debut in concert halls, with live musicians. Where's your symphony debuting? Anybody-can-upload-anything-for-people-to-download.com. I wonder if I can get my tux pressed in time.

Moses on the web

"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."

Mozart on a computer,

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

Dawing your Cellphone

"OMG, LOL!"

Gramophone dreams of mp3 player.

'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'

'I have multiple personalities and they are all following me on Twitter.'

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

Online Dating

"Will follow you on social media for food."

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

"I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. You're about to be inundated with phone calls from the press." "Whatever, geek-boy." "You're now the world's foremost authority on Turkey leprosy, the disease that's threatening to ruin the holidays." "No one'll believe that." "Oh yeah? I wrote a Wikipedia page for Turkey leprosy, too, along with examples of all the historical figures it's killed, such as the Archduke of Crushistan." "There is no 'Crushistan.'" "I've written a Wikipedia entry for C

A woman playing a keyboard

"And lastly, for my infinite perseverance, self-control and fortitude, I'd like to thank the Internet trolls."

Man from refuse department says: 'We'll send you a new wheelie bin, Mrs Trubshaw, there's really no need to 'orchestrate a mass Twitter campaign'.'

"Well, he looks alive as of 10 minutes ago, but the stream is frozen."

'I caught him watching tv, surfing the net, and playing video games ..book him!'

Technology and Love

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

"We do have on item the internet hasn't already beaten into the ground, ad nauseam."

'How do I get people to visit my...'

Zoom Wedding

'I don't care if he is the most interesting man in the world, his tweets about what he had for breakfast are still boring.'

Which Hogwarts house are you?

'I got caught in a blogstorm.'

"These cartoons are insulting! I don't like it at all! I would never watch something that shows Latinos like this!"

"You spend far too much time on social media, Joe!"

"Spaghetti Rave"

'I don't care what your chat group says. I say you're becoming overly dependent on technological gadgetry.'

"He just sits there, trying to think of the tweet to end all tweets."

"Buy my data $20"