Onion Layer Aficionado T-Shirts

"If I get too warm, I can always take a couple of layers off."

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

Stratigraphy

"I'm a monster."

Onion Tears

Rap-scallions

'That chap really knows his onions!'

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

Creative department ?

'Oh Rats! I can't be creative with a box of flat crayons!'

Virgin Olive Oil. Not-Virgin-But-Has-A-Heart-Of-Gold Olive Oil.

'That's Amore`!'-A pizza and the cook who made it

'What, no onion rings?'

'I'm not sure what you're talking about.'

"I've GOT to quit giving myself a bath after I eat sticky buns!"

'Smooth Mustard' and 'Coarse mustard'

"This vinegar's got lumps in it."

'No more beer and onions. The whole village smells to high heaven!'

'Can I at least get a business loan to buy cornchips?'

All-you-can-wear.

'Regardez - even le grand Escoffier cries quand il slices les onions.'

Cutting onions

Pig in the back room sits quivering as the chef offers bacon bits to a customer.

"It's half price because we ran out of lemons and used crushed onions."

'Do you have any last words? -- I'm going to smother you in onions.'

Seven Layers.

Indoor sauna.

'I told you: when it is too cold nothing is better than wearing layers.'

"My dad's tears? Oh, they're real alright: he's cutting onions..."

'We only have ketchup, relish and mustard, Moses dropped the other condiments on the way down,'

'Seven dollars for dilauril thiodipropionate. I think I'll switch to potassium metabisulfite.'

People, please listen. I'm talkin' 'bout your coffee. Haven't you wondered why it's so reddish and rich-looking here, but so watery when you make it at home? It's because they add due made of crushed beetles! Also, for all you know, it was grown in a tiny Colombian village by the impoverished love-children of secret service agents and courtesans. Never mind. Bugs! Bugs! You almost lost us.

"How long have you been a compulsive eater of onions?"

"You wear too many clothes."

'It's mustard man'