Old Technology Gifts

Early Portable Music System

'but when you used to listen to this wireless thingy what did you used to LOOK at

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

Fossil record player.

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"Go ahead and laugh, but this baby hasn't crashed since 1961."

"Thank you for the rewind, Miss Cooper. Now let us fast-forward to that fateful moment in February and hit the pause button."

Man hitting a TV and going out of focus himself.

The Final Chapter.

'Sure, I remember using carbon paper. Does that carbon date me?'

"The computer's messed up? How time flies! Seems only yesterday you couldn't program the VCR!"

'Yes, our phones have WIRES attached to them! We're no free-range blabbermouths in this household!'

'Music & Gym'

'When I was told our new computer was going to be state of the art, no one mentioned it was state of the art in 1954.'

A man watches TV while wearing a Marshall McLuhan sweatshirt.

He still refuses to upgrade.

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

"Oh, come on, you know we should have switched to touch-tone years ago."

Why not get God's fax number, and just fax him my prayer?

'In case of computer bug break glass.'

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

'And of course if you'e feeling patriotic today, we have here a new line of PCs produced by the federal government.'

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

Young Geeks.

Telephone Box

"I hope you're not in a hurry. Brother Augustus is our copying machine."

'This is a painting of your grandfather.'

'Sounds good! -- Have your beeper beep my beeper!'

'Built in obsolescence: Mini with a wind up gramophone.'

"I think you're using the old remote dear...."

'Walkman' 'Shuffle man'

'The key to inner peace? A land line.'