Old-school Strategists Gifts

As you like it - Parisians who will never be under police supervision

"Any questions?"

A war would have been bad enough, but losing Alsace-Lorraine in a poker game?

Business man reading 'Thinking Outside the Chair'

Eye Off the Ball

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

"And, finally, to my wife, my love and appreciation for her understanding and critical insights, without whom this project would never have been accomplished."

"Whatever happened to throwing Frisbees around?"

'They're encyclopedias, Timmy... They're an early form of Google.'

'No. No. Don't bomb them now. Wait until morning, when the birds are singing and the air is alive with a sense of possibility.'

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

'As you know, your father liked the sport of Boxing...'

"Call it wishful thinking, but I don't think this peace will last. . . ."

"Oh, you don't need to fight them—you just need to convince the pitchfork people that the torch people want to take away their pitchforks."

Battering ram is a giant key to unlock castle doors.

'That's funny - the computer said we had mail..'

Stun-gun target practice.

Fencing Venn Graph

Playing chess with a QR code for a chessboard

"May I have your attention? For Christmas, all I want is for everyone to write a note on how smart, charming and social I am. I'm collecting college reference letters before I enter my terrible teens."

"Do we look like investors in high-tech funds to you?"

Nerds night out: 'Dibs on Designated Driver.'

Forget what the warden says. If we try to please everyone, we'll end up with an escape plan that pleases no one.

'It was great! I learned how to use dial phones, drive a standard transmission and cook without a microwave...'

'It's not working, chief - fighting fire with fire.'

Hours After Iraq

'Grandpa says there's more to life than what you see on TV. He must not have cable.'

"Sure, you have to spend money to make money, but first you have to steal money."

"I hate everything with a chip in it that isn't chocolate."

'Dad! Open up to social networking. Stop being so Henry David Thoreau-ish!'

'All this talk of ABS's and old style MDP's is causing a lot of stress...The partners don't take kindly to change... He still hasn't recovered from us moving his desk nearer to the door!'

"The "Antelope Chess Club" is advertising the date, time and place of its general assembly! Methinks we'll pay them a visit..."

'It appears to be a weapon, but how do we deploy it against our rivals.'

"If you gatherers want anything other than tofu burgers, go and hunt it yourself!"