Old School Scribe Gifts

"Polishing my mouse just doesn't have the same calming effect as sharpening my pencil."

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Gen-Next Library

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

"First they came for the horoscope and the crossword and I did nothing. Then they came for the cartoonists and there was no-one left to satirise it."

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

"I want one of those. He takes notes and DOODLES at the same time."

Monks sitting at a row of computers typing up old-fashioned looking manuscripts.

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

'My battery is dead. How does it end?'

'I still write all my novels longhand.'

"Books are tricky. You can't text with a text book and you can't call with a phone book!"

"Tests! That's one thing I don't like about the end of school. I can't believe it! You're not finished studying, either?"

How can you read that comic strip Blondie? Its about a kinder, simpler time. It's about ancient history. They do the same material over and over. Exactly. I can count on it. Not like your stupid Pearls and Get fuzzy. Oooh, look how angry and edgy they are. They're sooo clever! Your whole gig is being angry and edgy. Look, I'm setting Candorville on fire.

'That's funny - the computer said we had mail..'

'Oh darling, it is not an ibook, it is only a book.'

'How long have you been submitting novels, Grandad?'

"Get a computer?! Do I look as though I have room in here for a computer?"

Monks form copier service.

'Lost your kindle in the cab? Try my outdated destined-for-extinction, low-priced print edition.'

"Actually, I'm sitting here reading a book—just to see if I can still do it."

"He calls it the eBible."

"It's your Grandpa's version of keeping up with technology...reading the papers online."

Monk on PC.

Must be old-timers – You don't see cursive anymore.

'Well, on a pencil that rubber thing is called an eraser, not a delete button.'

At 100 years old, Ceil pretty much spoke her mind...

How to hand in report to teacher.

'I feel useless: My Master has cancelled his newspaper subscription and reads his news online now...'

"So dad, you do know all that stuff happened yesterday, right?"

'You can swipe it as many times as you like, but that's not how a book works.'

"I'm cutting articles out of the newspaper while we still can."