Old-school Communicator Gifts

"We're actually gossiping at a water cooler instead of on social media. Does this make us hipsters?"

"I know it's a ransom note, but it's just so refreshing to get a handwritten letter these days."

I feel as if an interlude is coming to an end, Rosencrantz, and a new chapter begins anon. Stop using archaic words!! Fie! I have an appetency to force the world to bethink itself of anon.

Despite having never met her, Larry spent night after night waiting for a phone call from Scarlett Johansson....

"I'm old school. I still like to yell, 'Stay off my lawn' rather than text it."

'Son, remember you don't get instantaneous communication gratification from me...I'm still a land line person.'

'With government cyber snooping, we must communicate through channels no one would ever suspect...the postal service.'

'This is a letter opener, from the days before faxes and email. I just sold it online after I listed it as a vintage communication device.'

"My dad is sooo old-fashioned. He still talks with his mouth."

"Did you hear that Madison actually used her phone to make a phone call?"

"That's not an email, so you don't have to worry about it containing a virus. It's a birthday card from Nana."

"Before texting we had to write letters by hand, and before emojis we honestly just bottled up our emotions."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"My Gmail account is full. I can't get any more email." "So?" "I'll miss email. It was so old-timey. You could write hundreds or even thousands of words, with actual paragraphs." "People didn't see any little animations to show them you were typing. They had to actually wonder if you were going to reply." "And the spam was fun. You never got to hear from Nigerian princes while you're checking your texts." "Just delete stuff." "If you delete a few gigs of old emails, you'll be able to get n

Before social media there was sticky notes.

"Hi..just ringing to see if you got my e-mail?"

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

Four Stages of Communication: Tell, Bell, Cell, Hell.

1876 - Alexander Graham Bell made the world's first telephone call.

95 Theses That Will Blow Your Mind!

Beachcomber sees that smartphone displays 'message in a bottle.'

The Original Online Mom.

"Ignore it. Telemarketer."

'Doing this with his e-mails made more impact than sending them.'

'That's funny - the computer said we had mail..'

Bell invents the telephone.

"If I ever start using emojis have me moved to an assisted-living facility."

Next Year's Postal Service Marketing Campaign.

"Operator, I'd like to make a person-to-person call, and I'd like to reverse the roles."

"I'm well aware that your e-mail isn't working. I got your first message."

'It's just like e-mail, only you hear people talking.'

'I prefer old fashion email messages. I can always deny I ever got them.'

'Don't you dare to burn the food because you're texting with your buddies!'

A.T.&T.'s New Competitors

"Who says no one writes letters anymore?"